The Year That Was(n't)

A poignant scene in the 2009 animated movie starring Jim Carrey “A Christmas Carol” was when Scrooge went arguing with his nephew Fred on the merits of celebrating Christmas – these exchange of words before Fred left his uncle’s office after failing to invite him to a Christmas dinner goes like this…Scrooge: What reason have you to be merry? You're poor enough. Fred: What reason have you to be so dismal? You're rich enough.

That powerful statement mirrors for me in an oblique way the lesson of this ‘merry’ season, as well as the lessons I’ve learned this year that is about to end – 2010. It reflects our disposition when we act or not react to what has been happening in our lives. Sometimes, our actions are dictated not by the true measure of our self-worth but by ‘feelings’ we have from what we hear and we see around us. We lost track of what is essential – to be contented on what we have and not on gripe on things we don’t have in whatever form it may be i.e. career, family, finance, service, qualification, provision and love.

Of course, it’s not easy to be ‘merry’ when there’s a pile of bills to pay, debts to settle, mortgage repayments to make, broken relationship to mend, children to raise, difficult people to contend with, work to finish up, loneliness to fill, sickness to heal. The difficulty is more pronounced when in the middle of these problems in life is “you” or “me” in it. Imagine these problems happening without ‘you’ or ‘me’ involved. Would that attitude of being worried replaced by apathy; desperation with nonchalance; concern with indifference and unhappiness with contentment?

It suddenly dawned on me a thought that has been surreptitiously swimming in my mind and heart for a while now - That I can still be happy in the midst of these tumultuous problems just as long as “I” removed myself from it and let ‘Him” replace me. Let His plan evolve and not for me to solve. Let me gain His perspective and not my own directive. Let God provide and me to set aside. Let His purpose as my guide for me to abide. It may not be as simple as that…but it is really as simple as that. We lost track of what the main thing is…To keep the main thing the main thing – to let Go and let GOD.

And so to make justice to the title of this essay to parallel the truth of my realization – I’ve made a list of things that this year that ‘was not’ and to highlight what it ‘was’.

In the Homefront…

· - It wasn’t a good year for the company I’m working with – it was a ‘Great’ year as we transformed from a multi-million business to a billion dollar business. What makes it great was the recognition I got that I made a difference – whatever that was.

· -Joy was not keen to be 40, but feel truly blessed that she reached the golden age of where life truly starts.

· -My daughter Alexcie May wasn’t happy with what has happened in her relationships and studies but it gained her a lot of insightful perspective and painful lessons in love and in life.

· -It wasn’t our expectation but baby Caleb came into our lives – we’re now 10 in the family. God added a new blessing to us.

In the CFC Community…

-This year wasn’t a year of local evangelization because we went a step further from our local chapter to missions in Rockhampton, Perth and Solomon Islands.

· -This year wasn’t unproductive for the mums – we were blessed with babies like Gabriela Duque, Abigail Suerte and Caleb Osorio. These bubs confirmed God’s continuous blessings of life.

· -Many plans – our plans – was never realized because God’s plan to bond ourselves in fellowship, mission and prayer has dominated our service and commitment to the community.

· -It wasn’t a good year for many of our brethren who are still sick and ailing in their health. But somehow – their lives has changed and transformed us to be steadfast and persevering as they are and cling to the the Hope that God has promised redemption and healing.

· -It wasn’t an idle year in community activities – All of the ministries have two or more activities that made the year as busy as it can be. The stress is equated by the amount of effort you pour in multiplied by the how much time the activity lasted. And it yet it wasn’t even minutely enough compared to the selfless service the creator of the universe has to endure to be humiliated by being nailed to a thieves cross just to save his mere but beloved creatures.

In the Global Arena…

· -It wasn’t a good year in the global financial market. But it was year that exposes the volatility of our economies and the need to balance and control it. Money is not the root of all evils – the love of money is.

· -It wasn’t a good year for famous people gone haywire (the Woods, Gibsons, Lohans, Madoffs etc) due to scandals and public display of their embarrassing lives. It shows how weak and frail they are in spite of their fame and acclaim – echoes of Fred’s words to Scrooge - how these people’s lives are in dismal state despite of their worldly riches.

· -The state of our planet’s climate wasn’t what the meteorologist has expected and predicted. The constant changing of nature’s laws left many suffering from good produce, loss of shelter, physical dislocation, health issues and unpredictable weather. Desert lands became wet sands, spring traverse summers and lakes become barren soils. But it made us realize that despite of the advances in technology and human intelligence – we are still made of simple ash and only reason we still survive and live is God’s enduring love for us.

With all these things happening…what is in store for us in the new year? I don’t know and you may not know? Only He knows. And that what sustains us – our Faith. The truth that inspite of what the world is turning into – if we only put him First and Above all things, life can be as wonderful, good and as exciting as it would and could ever be. We survived for 2010 years – we shall survive and prevail in God’s hands.

And as we celebrate Christ’s birth in the next few hours…let us remember that we should not lost the spirit of expectancy like most of the world has lost the meaning of Christmas. We cannot prepare for an observance. We must prepare for an experience.

A blessed Christmas to all!

The "Mission"

I should have written this piece a week ago but because of the inanities of everyday modern life where changing my 2 year old son's nappies is as complicated and strenuous as building a multi-dimensional data cube from disparate business systems - has somehow started to drain and affect my fleeting euphoria from a spirit-filled experience. And so I have to press myself in writing down my thoughts on an experience I wouldn’t let my memory pass. A personal life-changing encounter comparable to Neil Armstrong's proverbial "One step for a man one giant leap for mankind" epigraph.

Sounds dramatic. Well, drama would be an understatement when me and my wife had just had our first christian evangelical mission for Couples for Christ. Yes, we were part of a mission team from Fairfield chapter to "establish" a relationship and plant the seed of christian community in the idyllic yet beautiful city of Rockhampton in Queensland - a touch of cliche, yes. I double-quoted the word "establish" for the reason that related phrases like build contacts; lay down the foundation; introduce the CFC ethos; set a mark in evangelizing; showed the way and etc. would not be enough to define the fulfillment of our objectives in that almost 3 day soujourn. But personally, I had chosen that word because it had fitted my own realization of what the mission was - it has substantiated my fledgling belief that God has a master plan after all.

That plan is but a page torn out of God's mysterious master strategy to send a ragtag team composed of "missionaries" whose personal life goals, I guess, were intertwined by a common thread of motivation - the need to demonstrate their desire to practice their faith. It may sound superfluous but in essence this is what I felt with my wife and the mission team. Because what greater reason would it be for a team leader to leave his wife who just had a recent surgery; a family to spend a fortune not to enjoy but to serve, a couple whose spiritual journey is as solid as a rock, a couple whose lone daughter is a living witness of their hunger to see where their faith leads; another couple who leverages their service for having a special child; my wife, even though pregnant has to let go of minding her 7 children to join me, who has to contend with working eight days a week just to have both ends meet...all of which are solid affirmation of Matthew's words (16:24-5)... if anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

Found it we did...the meaning of life in service. A mission fraught with so many unknowns but yet filled with unplaced conviction that somehow or something will be accomplished. A mission where value was not for the service we've given and rendered but for the rich experience and confirmation of faith we received. And talking about values - it somehow helped put myself and my outlook in life (including my wife) in a different perspective. The "mission" had provided me a glimpse of what life should be and the way it should be treated. The way we were welcomed in Rockhampton without the fanfare but with openness and humility of the "rocky" people has provided me personally of how true christian relationships should be built on - a sincere quid pro quo partnership based on honesty and love between the people doing the mission and the recipient of the mission.

I believe that the underlying principle in all the chapters in the bible is that living in Christ is a mission - Without it, we won't have anything left in the bible except the covers. A missionary is not a church planter or a soul-winner, a missionary is being Jesus to the world. It is ME being MYSELF to the world, but the key here is that the ME is Christ 'as me,' 'in me' and 'through me'. Being a missionary is allowing Jesus to do whatever it is that Christ has created me to do to my fullest potential in the world.

And we have shown that in the Rockhampton mission, the conviction to stay steadfast inspite of the conflicts in schedule, the time constraints, the unfamiliar territory, the untested ability to compress the talks and so on and forth. God's master plan was unfolding - the game should not be played by our rules of engagement but by the guidance of our coach, the ever primeval Holy Spirit. And we realized, learned and accepted that His plan was not only for us to plant the seed of christian community in that place but also to plant in our hearts the seed of mission and true faithfulness in Him no matter what and no matter when.

Passing thru the scenic place of Hawkesbury river on a train to Newcastle and looking at the tranquil waters slowly weaving its current toward the unknowing rail line, I can't help closing my eyes in absolute peace and seeing the mission team being given the sublime pat on the back by that Being we called God and saying to us...."Job well done".

Start Over

I got this from my old notes back in college...

When you've trusted God and walked his way

When you've felt his hand lead you day by day

But your steps now take you another way ...

Start over.

When you've made your plans and they've gone awry

When you've tried your best and there's no more try

When you've failed yourself and you don't know why ...

Start over.

When you've told your friends what you plan to do

When you've trusted them and they didn't come through

And you're all alone and it's up to you ...

Start over.

When you've failed your kids and they're grown and gone

When you've done your best but it's turned out wrong

And now your grandchildren come along ...

Start over.

When you've prayed to God so you'll know his will

When you've prayed and prayed and you don't know still ...

When you want to stop cause you've had your fill ...

Start over.

When you think you're finished and want to quit

When you've bottomed out in life's deepest pit

When you've tried and tried to get out of it ...

Start over.

When the year has been long and successes few

When December comes and you're feeling blue

God gives a January just for you ...

Start over.

Starting over means "Victories Won"

Starting over means "A Race Well Run"

Starting over means "God's Will Done"

Don't just sit there ............ ..

START OVER