A few days ago, Bro. Roy has requested me and my wife to share something on our experience when we had our CLP just last year. His email just popped out on my computer screen late that Sunday night when I was coincidentally working on the CFC Sydney website. I can’t refuse Bro Roy, how I wish I could, for I always consider him and his wife Rose as messengers of God to our family…the reason is that they were our facilitators during our CLP last year, close family friends, ninong to our miracle son, Joseph and eventually became our household leaders. So I was thinking last night, what would I share this afternoon. I was thinking along those lines when I saw my 5 year old son Lorenz playing Pacman in my laptop, that old arcade computer game.
It’s that game where a yellow circle with a mouth called pacman eats dots and prized along a square maze and avoids those ghosts in eating him.
I started to watch him play when I suddenly occurred to me That somehow that is how I believe God has been doing all the time in my life, before CLP and joining CFC.
Before joining the CLP last year I pride myself as a person who has the best things in life…a good and loving family, good competitive career, more than enough talent and skills, generally a good person…like Pacman who has also the dots available to swallow and prizes to grab…skillfully avoiding those ghosts who would eat him. Those ghosts are personifications of God who wants me to stop the game of eating away all those goods things and be aware of the greater things that is more important…The real meaning of Him, and be of real service to him and acknowledge my real purpose in this world.
Before I’ve undergone CLP here in Australia, my wife has been doggedly pursuing me to join the CFC (she is also one of those pacman ghosts) in the Philippines. I always successfully failed her not because I don’t want to…but because I don’t have a reason to do so. I always believe then that when you’re a good father, a good husband, a good provider, a good neighbour, a good parishioner…why do you want to push yourself to be a part of a community…you just complicate things when you are involved in such organization…conflicts, gossips, envy, jealousy and stuff like that. You lose your peace of mind and comfort zones. Though I was a God-loving and God fearing man…he was not central part of my life…He’s just there as third party, a peripheral being. I would rather serve man rather serve him and do the work for him…
Secondly, I have always this handy reason that a part of my work (travelling) won’t allow me to.
But that changed over time…like in Pacman, God has sent me multiple ghosts…those trials in my life…I lost my job of 13 years, I did not succeed in my business, I got another job but it separated me from family….I lost all those dots and prizes I can grab and God was on the verge of defeating me.
And that’s when I bargained myself with God…since I was generally a good person, I have earned a bonus round…I promised God that should I be able to successful in my plans to migrate to Australia…the first thing I would do is to satisfy my wife’s desire to attend a CLP at least.
God did not fail me….I was given a permanent skilled visa thru state sponsorship to Australia…Not only that, he gave me a ready job when I arrived here 18 months ago. My family settled comfortably and there have been a lot of friends especially in this community that has helped my family transitioned ourselves for an Australian way of life.
Now I was trapped…I have to fullfill my promise to Him…
So I joined the CLP…carrying along with me the cynical views I have, the bloated ego I have and the quiet arrogance about people. After the third week of CLP, something in me change after I listened to the speakers but more concretely when I saw the people who was trying to share their lives with me and my wife. One of those things I learned was...
I’ve learned from Bro. Ganni the essence of a dedicated leader.
I've learned from Bro Roy the true meaning of service.
I’ve learned from Bro. Raul how scriptures and God’s messages should be part of family discussion.
I’ve learned from Bro. Edwin and Bro Boyet that people really change for the better.
I’ve affirmed my wife’s dedication and desire for me in the actions of our sisters in the community.
And eventually, I surrendered to the Lord and humbly accepted him as a central part of my life. And how wonderful and enriching for me and for my wife to have that experience. I have gained a different perspective of God and how he works in my life and my marriage.
He is not a third party peripheral being anymore but a First party of all my plans and endeavours for my family.
I used to be very a impulsive, stringent and impatient person, I’ve realized that being more understanding and tolerant is not a bad option.
I used to question and mistrust other people’s motive in relating to me. I’ve realized that a person’s goodness and honesty is enough to win my heart.
I used to ridicule my wife’s inherent friendliness and compassion to others, I still sometimes do...but I’ve since shared her attitude and I realize how it lightens my own load.
Now, after one year in the community…It’s still a Pacman game…But this time, in a different version. God has given me the dots and prizes…the small miracles in our life, the blessings and gifts he has provided us…and yet nipping at my back anytime and ready to eat me in times that I’ve gone lukewarm in my commitment to him. I would be serving him by grabbing the right dots in the way and rejecting the evil paths that would lead me astray.
My wife and I would like to join you in this journey in this CLP…knowing who God really is, how he affects our lives, How he sends the Holy Spirit to guide us, and how we could be of great service to Him by serving others.
Thank you.
